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Dating online > 25 years > List of things to look for in a guy

List of things to look for in a guy

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What do you look for in a guy—good question, right? I think not. Beyond tall and good-looking and turns you on, what should you be looking for in the next guy you date? Well, I have 10 core attributes you should be looking for in your guy. If you think this is a feminine feature, well, then, I guess not being an asshole is girly, who knows.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: What Do Girls Look For In A Guy?

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: WHAT GIRLS LOOK FOR IN GUYS - everything you need to know - 2015

10 of the Most Important Qualities Women Look for in a Guy

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At the time, I had been dating my boyfriend for nine months, but he still hadn't told me he loved me. He did say, repeatedly, that he didn't believe in marriage. As tired as I was of waiting for him to take our relationship seriously, I trusted that he'd grow up sooner or later. At that point, I was living with a perpetually unemployed stoner. As tired as I was of hearing that my boyfriend wouldn't even consider settling down until his career was more established, I couldn't imagine kicking him to the curb based on his income-tax bracket.

But after that relationship ended, the fourth in a string of romantic failures, I could see that whatever I was doing, it wasn't working. Instead of questioning my selection criteria though, I just assumed there was something wrong with me. Maybe I was too emotional or too needy. Maybe I needed to talk things through too much. Somehow, even though I had never used any selection criteria beyond attraction in choosing guys to date, I was the one who didn't check all the boxes.

She pressed a finger into the table to emphasize her point. If a guy doesn't have everything you want, don't even think about dating him. As if it's that easy! I thought. Dating wasn't like shopping for a new car.

I couldn't just get all the features I wanted on the spot. And who would be so rigid and idealistic? After all, if I had been guided by a romantic checklist over the previous decade, I never would have dated half my exes. I definitely would've steered clear of my latest man-child boyfriend, who rarely had a steady job and only set his alarm clock to watch live coverage of the Tour de France in the middle of the night.

I'd always prided myself on being flexible about men. It could take the form of a shiny new Mercedes or a rusted out '72 Impala with a trunk that doesn't close. So why was I so surprised when one relationship after another broke down in the middle of the freeway, leaving me to weep into my hands until help arrived? Somehow, I was picky about everything else in my life but men.

I'd take months to decide whether or not to buy a pair of jeans. It took me a full year to choose the right rescue dog. But when it came to guys, I would always leap before I looked. Maybe I did need to be more clinical in my assessment of potential life partners. I'd already invested so much time and energy on men who not only had no intention of marrying me but also who, if I really thought about it, weren't up to my standards in the first place!

It wasn't like I was getting dumped time after time. Once I'd settle in and make a logical assessment, I didn't want to marry them either. So when I got back to Los Angeles, for the first time in my life, I made a list of what I was looking for in a man. It was a short list. I wanted a guy whose age was within eight years of mine, who was gainfully employed and enthusiastic about his career. And the most important item: I wanted someone who understood the value of honest communication.

I'd spent so many years with guys who never wanted to talk about their emotions. Whenever I brought up complicated, heavy subjects, they got nervous. I tried for so long to accept that men don't like to talk things out the way women do.

But it was frustrating and lonely to feel like I had so much to give, but what I had to give involved a lot of talking. I wanted to share my passions, my philosophies, my big ideas. But I always ended up feeling like a tedious teacher trying to browbeat her fidgety student.

That had to change. I couldn't stand to once again feel I was offering up my best and no one would take it. I had also dated enough by then to know that superficial traits like a pretty smile and nice laugh weren't going to see me through the tough times.

I'd go into each relationship fixated on some combination of a man's pretty eyes and the fact that we both loved dogs, and I'd come out of it bothered by my boyfriend's habit of sleeping until noon or storming out in the middle of an argument.

So much of what works or doesn't work in a relationship is revealed in the day to day, after all. But you don't have to wait until you're living together to understand a guy's personal beliefs and ideas about how he wants to live.

Are your habits in line? When you explain that something is important to you, does he take your word for it and try to respect your needs, or does he ask you to justify any feelings you have that he views as irrational? You don't need to read tea leaves or peer into a crystal ball to see the future with most guys. It's natural enough to want to list superficial traits on your relationship checklist. But instead of writing down "gorgeous" or "loves life" on a dating profile, it might make more sense to list behaviors and attitudes.

Making my list felt like a risk. I felt vulnerable admitting that I wanted a serious boyfriend. Wasn't it dangerous to want something so badly when I had no control over the outcome?

But in the weeks after writing my checklist, something shifted inside me. I felt more hopeful, more in control of what happened next. I knew, at last, I was either going to find what I was looking for or I was going to be alone and proud of myself for not settling for less than I deserved. And if I scared a guy off, so be it.

I have to admit, there were suddenly far fewer candidates milling about. I remember going to a wedding one weekend after I wrote my checklist and seeing clearly that none of the men hitting on me were right for me at all. One incredibly charming! Another funny! Another very sexy! As disappointing as it was not to have any romantic intrigue in my life, it was refreshing to see the playing field clearly for maybe the first time ever. I drove home from that trip feeling grateful that this time, I wouldn't be leaping into another dead-end relationship with the wrong guy.

It was empowering to realize I could guarantee my own happiness, just by refusing to settle. And a few months later, I met a man who not only held my interest but also checked lots of dreamy boxes that weren't even on my list. He was handsome, he had a career he loved, and he spent our first date talking my ear off, demonstrating both his intellectual interests and, more simply, his interest in talking, period. When he told me about his family and past relationships, he expressed his values clearly, but he also acknowledged his limitations.

He not only agreed to split the check but also greeted my strident feminist views as if it would be absurd for me to feel otherwise. And it became clear that at heart we were both homebodies with matching TV-marathon-loving tendencies. It's these kinds of similarities and habits that have made our 10 years together so gratifying. What has mattered most of all, though, was the key item on my list: My now-husband understood how important honest communication is to building a great life with another person.

When either of us feels frustrated or angry, we talk it out until we feel better. That shared belief has helped me immensely: I accept my flaws and take care of myself in ways I never did before, thanks to the fact that I can admit my weaknesses to my husband and know that he won't run away from me when I do. I'm a calmer, more generous, more open person as a result. It seems so obvious that I never should've settled for less.

But it can take a lot of trial and error to figure out the most obvious things. We all need to forgive ourselves for bungling our way toward true love. United States. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. I Quit Makeup for 8 Weeks Ben Goldstein. Come to think of it, maybe Jill had a point. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below.

Check That Checklist: What Do You Look for in a Guy?

There is a stigma in today's culture that makes it seems like women have an unattainable list of things they look for in a guy, but really we just want someone who can make us laugh, who loves us well and who makes us feel special. This is a big thing girls look for! We want a man who wants to be successful. We don't care if you want to be a teacher, a doctor or a trash man, as long as you reach your goal. We don't care about extravagant gifts, girls just want to feel loved!

Last Thursday I picked my 5-year-old up from kindergarten and she informed me that she has a boyfriend. Evidently, when you are 5 small details like names are not important when it comes to relationships.

Relationships are a complicated subject, and when you are a Christian, they are especially daunting. We should always be looking to keep our relationships pleasing to God. What is holy, however, can often be unclear. Looks are only skin-deep; what matters most is on the inside.

What You Should REALLY Look for in a Guy

Finding your person is no easy task. And sometimes it feels like the dating pool is filled with too many frogs, not nearly enough princes thanks, Meghan Markle. So we sat down with three relationship experts, including husband and wife marriage counselor duo and authors of the 30th Anniversary edition of Getting the Love You Want , Harville Hendrix Ph. Don't feel bad the next time you turn someone down because "the chemistry" just isn't there. McMahan says initially women are drawn to men based on attraction. Do I feel energized when I talk to this person? These are qualities that help to establish a foundation, to form a deeper connection, and a relationship with this person," McMahan says.

10 Things A Woman Should Look For In A Man

A friend of mine told me this story: she was taking dancing classes, and a really friendly guy had been giving her lots of attention for a couple of sessions. He was bumbling and wore oversized clothes. Remember this: girls, feminine by nature, are attracted to masculinity. Cuddly and nice, yes, but panty-wetting hot? A couple of things she told me:.

Common attributes that come to mind include intelligence, kindness, sense of humor, attractiveness, or reliability.

We all have that guy in our life who makes our heart go pitter-patter. The problem is that sometimes what the body wants — and what is good for us — are two completely different things. Sexual compatibility is only one part of being in a successful relationship, but we often put too much stake into it. There are people who we have so much chemistry with that sometimes it can cause an explosion — literally.

What to Look For in a Guy: 20 Things That Matter Beyond Looks

Some women treat finding the perfect guy like planning a wedding. Just make sure you only include the right things. Sparkling personality. Do you want him to make you laugh?

At the time, I had been dating my boyfriend for nine months, but he still hadn't told me he loved me. He did say, repeatedly, that he didn't believe in marriage. As tired as I was of waiting for him to take our relationship seriously, I trusted that he'd grow up sooner or later. At that point, I was living with a perpetually unemployed stoner. As tired as I was of hearing that my boyfriend wouldn't even consider settling down until his career was more established, I couldn't imagine kicking him to the curb based on his income-tax bracket. But after that relationship ended, the fourth in a string of romantic failures, I could see that whatever I was doing, it wasn't working.

20 Things That Girls Really Look For In A Guy

Regardless of his height, he is comfortable with the way he looks around you. He genuinely makes you laugh because he is funny, not because you think he is attractive and want to flatter him , and not a self-conscious little giggle, either. He remembers little things about you, even things that other people might consider unimportant or too minor. He knows what your favorite dish at the Thai place is. He knows what movie you two watched on your first date.

Apr 3, - Men and women have different opinions about a lot of things, but if you A sense of humor is high on a woman's wish-list for her perfect guy.

Это и мне сразу пришло в голову. Но послушай: канадец сказал, что буквы не складывались во что-то вразумительное. Японские иероглифы не спутаешь с латиницей. Он сказал, что выгравированные буквы выглядят так, будто кошка прошлась по клавишам пишущей машинки. - Коммандер, не думаете же вы… - Сьюзан расхохоталась.

16 Things Men Like in Women More Than Good Looks

От него так и веяло холодом. - Ermordung. Он… он был?. - Да, убит.

10 Things Every Christian Woman Should Look For In A Guy

К ней как-то не шло сквернословие - как неуместны сточные воды в хрустальном графине. Но, приглядевшись, он убедился, что она вовсе не такая изысканная особа, как ему показалось вначале. Веки припухли, глаза красные, левая рука у локтя - вся в кровоподтеках с синеватым отливом.

Потом, всего через несколько секунд, он должен был включить основные генераторы, и сразу же восстановились бы все функции дверных электронных замков, заработали фреоновые охладители и ТРАНСТЕКСТ оказался бы в полной безопасности.

А ты как думаешь. И уже мгновение спустя ее осенило. Ее глаза расширились. Стратмор кивнул: - Танкадо хотел от него избавиться.

Урчащий мотор шумным эхо отражался от стен, и он понимал, что это с головой выдает его в предутренней тишине квартала Санта-Крус. В данный момент у него только одно преимущество - скорость. Я должен поскорее выбраться отсюда. - сказал он. После множества поворотов и коротких рывков Беккер оказался на перекрестке трех улочек с табличкой Эскуина-де-лос-Рейес и понял, что уже был здесь минуту-другую .

Их синеватое свечение придавало находящимся предметам какую-то призрачную расплывчатость. Она повернулась к Стратмору, оставшемуся за дверью. В этом освещении его лицо казалось мертвенно-бледным, безжизненным.

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